You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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