GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
