he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I just blew my weed a kiss
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
