how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize