Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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