You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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