she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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