I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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