apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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