Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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