i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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