she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just forgot I was standing up.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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