So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
he puts the penis in happiness.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I have feelings that need drinking.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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