The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
