i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
