this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Randomize
