Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
third nipple confirmed
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
