nut hugger
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
