I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
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