The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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