At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
