im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Randomize
