It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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