Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize