You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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