he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
