Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
