there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Randomize
