rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
as a side note pls kill me
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
