So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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