I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
