this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
