im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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