guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
