chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
