Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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