look no pants
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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