he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Randomize
