Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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