Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
