it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
