By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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