now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize