My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
