Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
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