Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
