Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I want to be your penis for a week.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
