Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
