Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
