apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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